30: Nice to meet me…

The story starts in a mostly empty room. Pick a bar or club, hell it could be your favorite place to get cheap soda. There are other people around, but you want this time for yourself. The seat under you, the table in front and nothing but the thoughts in your head. And that my friends, is where the plot thickens, or as I like to put it; where shit gets real. It’s just you and your brain. Your ideas, dreams, hopes, inside jokes, and fears are all in the same place and there are no outside distractions for you to rely on. There was an ad in magazines and on TV a little while back that asked “would you have a beer with you?” That was an awesome question. Taking the beer part out of it, how many of us can really stand to be with just ourselves for a while? For some, this will be one of the easier things to while others will struggle to even find something to think about that brings a smile to their face.

One of the worst questions someone can ask me is “Why are you always so happy?” I never understood what they were asking, and the more I heard it, the more it would get to me. I’ve now come to find the question damn near offensive. As if happiness is some sort of sickness that you should only have every now and then or early in life so that it doesn’t bother you again, like chicken pox. I sometimes joke, that I smile because I’ve finally gone insane. In truth, I don’t know why I smile, and that the way uh huh, uh huh I like it. I’m not going to question my positive demeanor, mostly because the alternative is being that friend that people never really want to invite anywhere. I know that sometimes my personality grates on people; I’m like your second favorite food, good in small doses but not enough to keep around on a regular basis. I’ve made my peace with this, and knowing my place in other people’s worlds makes it so much easier to live in my own. My skin fits me just right, and I can make myself laugh enough to draw attention in a crowd. I like never having to worry about where my next form of entertainment is going to come from. Being mentally secure is liberating. So what about those killjoys we all know, and love enough to keep around even though the suck the energy right out of us?

They’re sitting in that same mostly empty room, and their face is screwed. They’d rather be anywhere else but in that moment. The killjoy of the group likes to think they bring balance, provide those moments of insight they think others are missing. I’m finding it hard to type how wrong they are. Playing the contrarian at every turn doesn’t make you insightful, it makes you annoying. When the group wants Chinese, and you want Mexican even though you just claimed you weren’t hungry to begin with, all you’re doing is making things difficult. Now we’re all going to eat an hour later, and it’s probably going to be pizza. Thank you very little. Two of my favorite ghost movies have the same theme; the dead don’t know it yet. They want to interact with us, and have something to say, but they’re not aware enough of themselves to do anything. Ever notice that killjoy never has a real plan of what they want to do, but knows exactly what they don’t want all the time. How much mental energy do they waste on negativity figuring out what they don’t like? That’s no way to go about life.

So much time is dedicated to trying to make people feel comfortable physically, and I don’t think enough goes into the mental aspect. My State of Mined is “All Smiles”. I don’t have some delusion things being peachy all the time, but my default setting is happy face. Next time you get the chance, turn the TV off, go outside and see what piques your interest. I got lost in the woods a while back looking for a place to relax. It was some of the most fun you can legally have. I know more about what makes me happy than sad, I know that there are things out there that I’ve never done that I can’t wait to do, most importantly there are things out there that I may have already done that I’m willing to do again. Life is the journey, and it should be spent doing things. Cynics spend more time talking trash about the things that other people like than they do actually doing anything themselves. So there you are, back in that room. The seat underneath you and the table in front. Are you looking for a reason to leave, or a reason to stay?


Carpe Diem Kids


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My thoughts on the pop culture world, nothing more, nothing less.

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